Finally Offspring #1 took over. He took his role very seriously and took a number of shots where I was almost centred in the frame. Blurry, but centred. He actually did a great job but they are just a little too 'honest' for me to be happy with them. I've been putting off learning how to use Photoshop for ages - I guess I'm going to have to now if I want a nice pic of myself!